I imagine that if you were to ask people what job they would least like to have you would receive quite a long and varied list of answers. However, I also imagine that you would see some occupations that make the list time and again. Discovery Channel had an entire series about undesirable jobs called "Dirty Jobs," and quite frankly most of the jobs they featured I would not want to do. Some occupations that I believe would make the list multiple times are:
Ditch Digger
Garbage Man
Dog Euthanizer
Hooker
Coal Miner
Dentist (could not resist)
Don't get me wrong. I mean no disrespect to the fine people that do in fact have these occupations. We as a society appreciate those who are willing to do these jobs, and I am not attempting to pass any judgement on those who do find themselves with these jobs. Simply, I am making a list of jobs that I believe most people would not want to do.
However, yesterday I found a job that I would particularly dislike to have. That job is not on my previous list, although most of those jobs I would not care to do either. The job that came to my attention yesterday as undesirable is: New weatherman at the weather channel.
Here you are with your brand new job at the Weather Channel. You're all excited about making the weather lively and entertaining. You have aspirations that maybe you could be the next Letterman; prediciting hail stones the size of canned peas one day, and multi millionaire media personality endowing a scholarship for "C" students at your alma mater the next day. Then comes along the storm of the century, the hurricane to end all hurricanes. This storm is so bad that the Kraken refuses to be released. Godzilla tells Tokyo "ねえ、あなたはあなた自身にある"
You prepare yourself for a long day at the office. Probably gonna be spending the night at the Weather Center breaking into regularly scheduled programming to show the world how well you can stand in front of a green screen and tell them how terrible the storm has become. Then comes the call. It's your time to shine. The Big Weather Guy Upstairs calls your name. You make sure your hair looks good so you look great on TV. Check that you have clean underwear so your mom will be proud. Then you are given your assignment: "Head on down to the beach so you can give us a report on how the storm is coming along." Wait...What?
here's a little tune about it:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vWwgrjjIMXA
Now you are in a quandry. You are going to be on TV, but you get to stand in rain coming at you sideways, 90 mph winds that gust up to 115mph, and you are given a cap, and a rain jacket. You get to your post, and you're not even sure if you are facing the camera because your eyelids are flapping in the wind so badly that you can't even see. Heck, for all you know they did not send a cameraman, and it's all a big prank just to see if you will do it. You also have a bit of trepidation about standing in calf deep water while surrounded by all the electrical equipment necessary to broadcast.
Finally, you see a light ahead of you and you believe that it is either your Guardian Angel come to take you home, or the cameraman. Next, you hear someone in your ear ask, "how's the weather out there?" Your first inlcination is to tell that faceless, dry voice to "suck it," but then you realize that you are on air, and your mom is watching from her home in Oklahoma, where there is not a hurricane. Somehow you manage to make the storm seem like it's not that big a deal. You don't mention that the only reason you are able to stand in one place is that you nailed your boots to the ground. Overall, you make the latest hurricane seem a bit exciting, glamorous even. The faceless voice thanks your for your report, and you think to yourself "thank God, now I can get back to the office." Then you hear that voice say, "We'll check back with you in a bit to continue our coverage of this storm." Wait...What? Maybe I should have been a dentist.
my favorite storm song:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lS-af9Q-zvQ
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
Sunday, October 28, 2012
Tears of a Clown
Again, I apologize for not posting something in the last couple of days. I'm in Texas hanging out with a cool kid that also happens to be my daughter, and working on becoming gainfully employed in this large state. The good news is that I have been successful on both fronts. Shall we now continue on the the good stuff?
It's a good thing they turn the lights down low and make it dark in movie theaters. I have to admit that I cry at movies. Heck, I even cry at some commercials on TV. You've probably seen the commercial where there is a little girl (maybe 7 yrs old) in the driver's seat of the family car, her dad is leaning in the passenger side window giving this little girl some final instructions, the little girl says "daddy, I know," then in the end they show that she is actually a teenaged girl. Yep, I cry. Have no clue what they are trying to get me to buy in that commercial because the TV screen is a bit hazy through the tears.
Heard a song about it, it's a must see/hear:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ls2lC7DQFMI
I bet you thought it was going to be Smokey Robinson!!!! predictable I am not. LOL well I try to keep you on your toes.
Friday evening my aforementioned daugther and I went to the movies and we saw a new comedy called "Fun Size." Comedy? you betcha. Tear Jerker? well I think I was the only one in the theater crying, but I may have caught a glimpse of some teary eyed stuff going on with my daughter. A chip off the old block; I'm quite proud.
The movie is pretty funny, and I would recommend it. Not the funniest movie in the world, but it was good. Maybe a good matinee movie. Most of you can probably leave the tissues at home. If you are easily offended by mild sexual humor, then you should probably just stay at home and watch Little House on the Prairie, or learn how to loosen up a little bit and laugh at the human race. My favorite part is when I threatened to strangle everyone in the theater if they did not shut their traps. (that may have only happened in my mind, but it was still pretty good.) Seriously, i have no idea why people go to the movie theater and proceed to carry on a conversation through the whole movie, but I digress. If you like cute kids in Halloween costumes, then you'll enjoy this movie. And stick around for the credits. Right before the credits start really rolling there is a pretty good extra scene.
Previous movies that have produced tears for me:
Beaches
E.T.
College Road Trip
Helter Skelter (albeit for different reasons than the previous. it scared the bajeezus out of me)
Pretty much any movie that has to deal with children growing up and getting out on their own.
So come and take my man card. Pry it out of my hands if you will. Well, actually it is all moist and shredded in the way that only comes from being wet for too long as I have cried on it way too many times. Personally, I believe a real man should show his emotions. And if it's wrong to get emotional when I think about my daughter, then I don't wanna be right.
since it's Sunday, how about a 2fer on the music:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DPtK5V5wKz0
It's a good thing they turn the lights down low and make it dark in movie theaters. I have to admit that I cry at movies. Heck, I even cry at some commercials on TV. You've probably seen the commercial where there is a little girl (maybe 7 yrs old) in the driver's seat of the family car, her dad is leaning in the passenger side window giving this little girl some final instructions, the little girl says "daddy, I know," then in the end they show that she is actually a teenaged girl. Yep, I cry. Have no clue what they are trying to get me to buy in that commercial because the TV screen is a bit hazy through the tears.
Heard a song about it, it's a must see/hear:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ls2lC7DQFMI
I bet you thought it was going to be Smokey Robinson!!!! predictable I am not. LOL well I try to keep you on your toes.
Friday evening my aforementioned daugther and I went to the movies and we saw a new comedy called "Fun Size." Comedy? you betcha. Tear Jerker? well I think I was the only one in the theater crying, but I may have caught a glimpse of some teary eyed stuff going on with my daughter. A chip off the old block; I'm quite proud.
The movie is pretty funny, and I would recommend it. Not the funniest movie in the world, but it was good. Maybe a good matinee movie. Most of you can probably leave the tissues at home. If you are easily offended by mild sexual humor, then you should probably just stay at home and watch Little House on the Prairie, or learn how to loosen up a little bit and laugh at the human race. My favorite part is when I threatened to strangle everyone in the theater if they did not shut their traps. (that may have only happened in my mind, but it was still pretty good.) Seriously, i have no idea why people go to the movie theater and proceed to carry on a conversation through the whole movie, but I digress. If you like cute kids in Halloween costumes, then you'll enjoy this movie. And stick around for the credits. Right before the credits start really rolling there is a pretty good extra scene.
Previous movies that have produced tears for me:
Beaches
E.T.
College Road Trip
Helter Skelter (albeit for different reasons than the previous. it scared the bajeezus out of me)
Pretty much any movie that has to deal with children growing up and getting out on their own.
So come and take my man card. Pry it out of my hands if you will. Well, actually it is all moist and shredded in the way that only comes from being wet for too long as I have cried on it way too many times. Personally, I believe a real man should show his emotions. And if it's wrong to get emotional when I think about my daughter, then I don't wanna be right.
since it's Sunday, how about a 2fer on the music:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DPtK5V5wKz0
Thursday, October 25, 2012
Passenger
Recently, I had the pleasure of making a trek halfway across this great country to the Grande state of Texas. Along the way I had several observations, mostly because I had nothing else to do other than make observations. Well, there was the 45 minute nap I took, and 15 minutes of faking a nap, but that may be discussed later.
Some entertainment for those that like to be entertained:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hLhN__oEHaw
I began my journey by riding the MARTA to the Atlanta airport. Yes, I said it "the MARTA." For those of you that are sticklers for details I am aware that it is called Hartsfield-Jackson Airport, but that is just too much to type more than once. I may just rename it the ATL plane place. As I was sitting on the train I noticed that they had conveniently posted some rules for riding the train. (for those of you that are not a part of the Greater Atlanta area, MARTA is our rapid transit system that is comprised of a subway and a bus system. It's not as good as NYC's, but it will eventually get you somewhere; maybe even where you want to be!!!) I found these rules very helpful, and thought maybe I should share. The list began with common sense rules you will see many places: no smoking, no weapons, no panhandling. The last rule, and my favorite, no assault of MARTA employees. At first glance, this rule seems like a good one. I definitely would not want to be on a subway train whose driver is being assaulted. Seems like a recipe for disaster and a plot for several movies. However, a couple of stops later I realize that they do not specifically forbid the assault of MARTA passengers. Now if I had to choose, I would much rather have the MARTA employee suffer some abuse than myself. Selfish? most assuredly, but I like to think of it more as a survival instinct. With great fortune, I made it to the airport sans any MARTA condoned assault of my self.
At the airport is where a majority of individuals seem to magically become farm animals. Herds of them scurry around with a wide-eyed gaze indicative of a collective "HUH?" (use your best Scooby voice for that.) Typical questions overheard as I make my way throught the airport: "You mean I gotta check my bag?" (no, kind sir, you are the exception and may bring that armoire as your carry on bag. Oh you have two armoires? no problem you are also allowed a personal item.) Other favorites: "Am I in the right place?" (no). "Do I need to take my belt and shoes off?" (in the security line of course.) Absolutely not, we would love for you to just come on throught with your shoes and belt that clearly have been laced with some undesirable Anarchist's Cookbook specialty. Welcome aboard!
Overall, the trip was a good one. I landed safely, and even survived MARTA. Subway trains and airports are grand places to take a few minutes to laugh at our species. It is enjoyable to see just how many people can fit on a MARTA train before someone has to <gasp> sit next to another human. It's as if we all suspect each other of being carriers for leprosy, or ebola. (one guy probably was as he hacked up at least a dozen lungs.) The remaining mystery for the trip is exactly what happened to our pilot? Before take off, he sounded like a typical southern male. Just a hint of an accent, but a hardy good nature about his voice. After we land, he sounded like he could be a Middle Eastern man. (not middle eastern USA) voice was a bit harsh; I was certain that I was about to become a character in a not too distant historical drama film, but alas we were allowed to exit. Maybe if we had not spent 30 days awaiting take off at the ATL plane place I would have been less suspicious.
I will keep my eyes open for more humor on my next flight.
Enjoy the entertainment posted and look for another post sometime in this lifetime. Unless i am assaulted on MARTA.Maybe I'll just get a MARTA uniform to wear when i travel on the train.
Some entertainment for those that like to be entertained:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hLhN__oEHaw
I began my journey by riding the MARTA to the Atlanta airport. Yes, I said it "the MARTA." For those of you that are sticklers for details I am aware that it is called Hartsfield-Jackson Airport, but that is just too much to type more than once. I may just rename it the ATL plane place. As I was sitting on the train I noticed that they had conveniently posted some rules for riding the train. (for those of you that are not a part of the Greater Atlanta area, MARTA is our rapid transit system that is comprised of a subway and a bus system. It's not as good as NYC's, but it will eventually get you somewhere; maybe even where you want to be!!!) I found these rules very helpful, and thought maybe I should share. The list began with common sense rules you will see many places: no smoking, no weapons, no panhandling. The last rule, and my favorite, no assault of MARTA employees. At first glance, this rule seems like a good one. I definitely would not want to be on a subway train whose driver is being assaulted. Seems like a recipe for disaster and a plot for several movies. However, a couple of stops later I realize that they do not specifically forbid the assault of MARTA passengers. Now if I had to choose, I would much rather have the MARTA employee suffer some abuse than myself. Selfish? most assuredly, but I like to think of it more as a survival instinct. With great fortune, I made it to the airport sans any MARTA condoned assault of my self.
At the airport is where a majority of individuals seem to magically become farm animals. Herds of them scurry around with a wide-eyed gaze indicative of a collective "HUH?" (use your best Scooby voice for that.) Typical questions overheard as I make my way throught the airport: "You mean I gotta check my bag?" (no, kind sir, you are the exception and may bring that armoire as your carry on bag. Oh you have two armoires? no problem you are also allowed a personal item.) Other favorites: "Am I in the right place?" (no). "Do I need to take my belt and shoes off?" (in the security line of course.) Absolutely not, we would love for you to just come on throught with your shoes and belt that clearly have been laced with some undesirable Anarchist's Cookbook specialty. Welcome aboard!
Overall, the trip was a good one. I landed safely, and even survived MARTA. Subway trains and airports are grand places to take a few minutes to laugh at our species. It is enjoyable to see just how many people can fit on a MARTA train before someone has to <gasp> sit next to another human. It's as if we all suspect each other of being carriers for leprosy, or ebola. (one guy probably was as he hacked up at least a dozen lungs.) The remaining mystery for the trip is exactly what happened to our pilot? Before take off, he sounded like a typical southern male. Just a hint of an accent, but a hardy good nature about his voice. After we land, he sounded like he could be a Middle Eastern man. (not middle eastern USA) voice was a bit harsh; I was certain that I was about to become a character in a not too distant historical drama film, but alas we were allowed to exit. Maybe if we had not spent 30 days awaiting take off at the ATL plane place I would have been less suspicious.
I will keep my eyes open for more humor on my next flight.
Enjoy the entertainment posted and look for another post sometime in this lifetime. Unless i am assaulted on MARTA.Maybe I'll just get a MARTA uniform to wear when i travel on the train.
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
wake me when it's over
I apologize for leaving all of you hanging the last few days; the multitudes worrying if I will ever post another blog. I'm in the middle of a transition from one state to another, from a solid to a liquid, and it can be a bit time consuming.
Also, I have found that some days my brain simply falls right out of my head as I am forced to hear all of the political ads that seem to never stop these days. We are nearing that greatly anticipated event that happens once every 4 years. No, it's not World Cup Soccer, nor is it the Olympics (neither winter nor summer). We could only be so blessed to have one of those events about to happen. As I'm sure you have all guessed I am talking about the upcoming US Presidential Election. <yawn> just saying it makes me tired, and weary. This post is about as political as I will get.
Willie said it best here (although i'm certain he was not talking about the Presidential Election):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zebNO0flyzQ
although, he may have been high ontop of the White House while writing this song. One can never be sure.
When I was younger, so much younger than today, I enjoyed following the political climate of the world. I enjoyed engaging in political discourse with friends, and tried to keep up with the different people that made up our government. However, that was then. Somewhere along the way I lost all interest. Maybe I just got tired of all the rhetoric that gets slung around. Maybe I decided that none of these boobs (no offense to boobs, I have no problem with boobs) were going to do anything to improve my situation, and took it upon myself to improve my own self. (novel idea, i know). (seriously, boobs are A-ok or DD-ok).
Here we are on the cusp of our quadrennial trip to the polls to punch a button and throw in our vote. I can almost hear the music of the piper as I enter the hallowed halls of the local elementary school cafeteria. Our regularly scheduled programming is shanghaied so that we are given the pleasure of watching "the debates." I use the term debate loosely, as to me it is more of a "whose is bigger" contest. Or an event to see who can get the most and best "zingers" in in the alotted time. If I wanted a President that was good with "zingers," I would vote for Seinfeld, or Chris Rock, or any number of well practiced comedians. Shoot, I might even vote for myself if that were the requirement.
My take on the whole event is that there is no way to really know what any candidate stands for at all. It seems that all they want to do these days is talk about how awful the other guy is rather than tell you what it is they want to do, or how they plan to fix the problems that exist today. Maybe Don Rickles is the man for the job, he was pretty good at getting in verbal jabs. So was Bob Hope.
We have been duped into believing that we have a 2 party system; when the reality is we do not. Anyone can start up a political party, and have a candidate on the ballot. However, the two dominant parties have rigged it so that others do not really get any recognition. Sounds like the American way.
What needs to happen is we need to step out of our labels, and get to the heart of what is going wrong in this country and fix it. That will require innovative thinking. It will require compromise, and it is going to piss some people off. It will mean that we need to rid ourselves of career politicians, and elect people that are willing to think outside of the box; willing to forget that they are associated with a particular party and understand that they are working for America and not working to simply get themselves re-elected.
Let's all be honest with ourselves. I hear people talk about how a candidate LIED. How egregious, and unbelievable to imagine. What irritates me the most about these statements is that the truth is both of them are guilty of telling lies. So please be equitable, please be honest with yourself and be willing to admit that your particular horse in the race lies as much as the opponent. And while we are at it, let me clarify how I think about lying.
When we are called to testify in a court of law, we are asked to take the following oath: Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Kind of a funny oath because you would think that all you would need to swear to is to tell the truth. However, each statement is necessary as it's possible to tell the truth, but omit certain facts, or maybe add in unrelated facts. The candidates should be forced to take this oath prior to running for office. The "lies" they tell are not so much completely false as they are "half-truths" or they take data and twist it to fit their point of view. It's maddening. who has the time to fact check all of the crap they sling around, and where do we find non-biased references to do the fact checking. Hear me again when I say that BOTH of them use these tactics. Neither one of them is providing us with the TRUTH. So if you plan to call one of them a liar, please be able to accept that your chosen candidate has also lied.
All of it makes me want to fall into a deep coma and just wake up when it is all over. I'm tired of it all. It does not matter who we elect, as nothing is really going to change. At least none of the major problems are going to be fixed, because that would leave them with nothing to argue about at the next election.
I'm just going to go take my SOMA and be happy with my pre-selected life. Someone wake me when it's over. enjoy the song of the day.
Once again, no offense to boobs.
Also, I have found that some days my brain simply falls right out of my head as I am forced to hear all of the political ads that seem to never stop these days. We are nearing that greatly anticipated event that happens once every 4 years. No, it's not World Cup Soccer, nor is it the Olympics (neither winter nor summer). We could only be so blessed to have one of those events about to happen. As I'm sure you have all guessed I am talking about the upcoming US Presidential Election. <yawn> just saying it makes me tired, and weary. This post is about as political as I will get.
Willie said it best here (although i'm certain he was not talking about the Presidential Election):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zebNO0flyzQ
although, he may have been high ontop of the White House while writing this song. One can never be sure.
When I was younger, so much younger than today, I enjoyed following the political climate of the world. I enjoyed engaging in political discourse with friends, and tried to keep up with the different people that made up our government. However, that was then. Somewhere along the way I lost all interest. Maybe I just got tired of all the rhetoric that gets slung around. Maybe I decided that none of these boobs (no offense to boobs, I have no problem with boobs) were going to do anything to improve my situation, and took it upon myself to improve my own self. (novel idea, i know). (seriously, boobs are A-ok or DD-ok).
Here we are on the cusp of our quadrennial trip to the polls to punch a button and throw in our vote. I can almost hear the music of the piper as I enter the hallowed halls of the local elementary school cafeteria. Our regularly scheduled programming is shanghaied so that we are given the pleasure of watching "the debates." I use the term debate loosely, as to me it is more of a "whose is bigger" contest. Or an event to see who can get the most and best "zingers" in in the alotted time. If I wanted a President that was good with "zingers," I would vote for Seinfeld, or Chris Rock, or any number of well practiced comedians. Shoot, I might even vote for myself if that were the requirement.
My take on the whole event is that there is no way to really know what any candidate stands for at all. It seems that all they want to do these days is talk about how awful the other guy is rather than tell you what it is they want to do, or how they plan to fix the problems that exist today. Maybe Don Rickles is the man for the job, he was pretty good at getting in verbal jabs. So was Bob Hope.
We have been duped into believing that we have a 2 party system; when the reality is we do not. Anyone can start up a political party, and have a candidate on the ballot. However, the two dominant parties have rigged it so that others do not really get any recognition. Sounds like the American way.
What needs to happen is we need to step out of our labels, and get to the heart of what is going wrong in this country and fix it. That will require innovative thinking. It will require compromise, and it is going to piss some people off. It will mean that we need to rid ourselves of career politicians, and elect people that are willing to think outside of the box; willing to forget that they are associated with a particular party and understand that they are working for America and not working to simply get themselves re-elected.
Let's all be honest with ourselves. I hear people talk about how a candidate LIED. How egregious, and unbelievable to imagine. What irritates me the most about these statements is that the truth is both of them are guilty of telling lies. So please be equitable, please be honest with yourself and be willing to admit that your particular horse in the race lies as much as the opponent. And while we are at it, let me clarify how I think about lying.
When we are called to testify in a court of law, we are asked to take the following oath: Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Kind of a funny oath because you would think that all you would need to swear to is to tell the truth. However, each statement is necessary as it's possible to tell the truth, but omit certain facts, or maybe add in unrelated facts. The candidates should be forced to take this oath prior to running for office. The "lies" they tell are not so much completely false as they are "half-truths" or they take data and twist it to fit their point of view. It's maddening. who has the time to fact check all of the crap they sling around, and where do we find non-biased references to do the fact checking. Hear me again when I say that BOTH of them use these tactics. Neither one of them is providing us with the TRUTH. So if you plan to call one of them a liar, please be able to accept that your chosen candidate has also lied.
All of it makes me want to fall into a deep coma and just wake up when it is all over. I'm tired of it all. It does not matter who we elect, as nothing is really going to change. At least none of the major problems are going to be fixed, because that would leave them with nothing to argue about at the next election.
I'm just going to go take my SOMA and be happy with my pre-selected life. Someone wake me when it's over. enjoy the song of the day.
Once again, no offense to boobs.
Friday, October 19, 2012
you got a point?
Allow me a moment to take care of a little business. Thank you very much to Krissany for showing me how to link my blog to my Facebook page. This edition will be the first one I have written since I have been enlightened unto the wily ways of the internet; so hopefully it will work. She's pretty sharp, so I am certain that it will. Now on to the meat of this post. I know each of you have lost sleep in anticipation of each post.
A most vile and egregious revolution has occured in our society, and we have all just sat back oblivious to the horror. Maybe our apathy stems from the slow pace of this foul event, or maybe we have simply lost the energy to battle such evil forces. I am certain that many small militias have fought valiantly to rebuff the forces that have descended upon us. Heroes have fallen, and maybe even families have been broken during this revolution. Friends, I implore you to continue to fight the good fight. Stand strong and face this enemy that has dared to bring such disharmony to our homes. Let us repel the horror that is "text language."
I feel that I must confess to two things before I proceed. 1) I text like a teen-aged girl. I probably send a few thousand texts a month. In fact most of my conversations are via text message. I have never enjoyed talking on the phone, and the advent of text messaging was like a new birth for me. 2) I am aware that my grammatical/punctuation skills have diminished dramatically over the years. Well, a third confession is that I am less of a strict grammarian and more of a "as long as the person you are communicating with understands you all is ok," kind of person.
In general, I accept the change. Personally, I usually text in complete sentences and whole words. I have not adopted the slang or abbreviated sentences that seem to pervade text messages. I do have an affinity for LOL, and emoticons. For me the tragedy is when this "language" finds it's way into other forms of writing. I have received resumes with text language, and I know professors/instructors who have received papers from students that appear to have been written on the student's iPhone. I'm sorry, but I just can't bring myself to hire someone that cannot take the time to write a proper resume. Some will argue that I could be passing on the greatest employee I ever had, but to me it just shows a sign of laziness when you can't take the time to use proper grammar while writing your resume.
Besides having to ask my 12 year old how to interpret an entire page of random letters strung together, I also enjoy the new punctuation. For the most part, I have observed that punctuation does not exist in text language. Call Judge Judy, because I am also guilty of not using punctuation when I text. However, when I do write outside of the world of text messages I do use punctuation. Although, I do believe that I overuse, the, comma, at times, in, my sentences, IDK.
One of my favorite new punctuation marks is: !!! I really do not know if there is a name for this mark. I know that "..." is an ellipsis. It was one of my favorite things to use when I was in college. At this time my sister should probably just skip to the end of this post, and not read the following section. Just pretend that I have an ellipsis placed in this part. I was writing a paper in college. It may have been one of my last papers. Anyway, the professor required us to use a certain number of references for our paper. OMG!!! I ALWAYS!!! hated that. I felt that if I could write my paper with fewer references, and still make lucid points, then it should not matter. I was finished with the paper, but needed one more reference. I found a sentence in a particular book that I had not quoted yet, but the middle part of the sentence I wanted to use really did not support my point. In fact, it may have supported the opposite. (Seriously, skip to the end ... ... ... . that should get my sister to move forward.) Well, here comes the ellipsis, buddy, pal, friend to those in desperate need. (the other thing you should know is that I wrote all of my papers the night before. so the library was not open at midnight the night before my paper was due.) (to the younger generation, a library was a big old building with a ton of books in it. Think of it as yesteryear's internet. To access it you had to drive to the building and enter the doors, then use a search engine called a card catalog. it was manual.) I digress. Soooo, maybe an ellipsis was inserted in place of the section of the sentence that disagreed with my point, and the remainder of the sentence fit perfectly into my paper. Whew! another A on my paper.
I told you that story to take up some space. (back in the day it was called BS to extend your paper.) Now we are presented with "!!!" what does it mean? I know that "!" is used to imply strong emotion, so maybe "!!!" means HEY I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY, mean it. Why three exclamation points? Why not two, or four? Is five right out? Is there some rule similar to the rules for the Holy Hand Grenade of Anitoch whereby we shall not pass three? Will my sentence self-destruct should I <gasp> put !!!!! at the end of my sentence? IDK The pressure and strain of new rules for punctuation is overwhelming.
Maybe "!!!" is a more severe ellipsis. Maybe it means "hey I edited the heck out of this quote, and it probably does not even retain its original meaning." Perhaps, had I been writing that final college paper in today's world I would have used "!!!" to get my last reference in my paper. That probably would have led to me getting a B on the paper which would have really ticked me off and led to me sending a WTF? email to my professor, and then double secret probation.
THIS IS THE SECTION TO WHICH MY SISTER SHOULD SKIP, OR MAYBE JUST READ TOMORROW'S POST AND FORGET THIS ONE EXISTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL
ABT2 B2W
TTYL!
A most vile and egregious revolution has occured in our society, and we have all just sat back oblivious to the horror. Maybe our apathy stems from the slow pace of this foul event, or maybe we have simply lost the energy to battle such evil forces. I am certain that many small militias have fought valiantly to rebuff the forces that have descended upon us. Heroes have fallen, and maybe even families have been broken during this revolution. Friends, I implore you to continue to fight the good fight. Stand strong and face this enemy that has dared to bring such disharmony to our homes. Let us repel the horror that is "text language."
I feel that I must confess to two things before I proceed. 1) I text like a teen-aged girl. I probably send a few thousand texts a month. In fact most of my conversations are via text message. I have never enjoyed talking on the phone, and the advent of text messaging was like a new birth for me. 2) I am aware that my grammatical/punctuation skills have diminished dramatically over the years. Well, a third confession is that I am less of a strict grammarian and more of a "as long as the person you are communicating with understands you all is ok," kind of person.
In general, I accept the change. Personally, I usually text in complete sentences and whole words. I have not adopted the slang or abbreviated sentences that seem to pervade text messages. I do have an affinity for LOL, and emoticons. For me the tragedy is when this "language" finds it's way into other forms of writing. I have received resumes with text language, and I know professors/instructors who have received papers from students that appear to have been written on the student's iPhone. I'm sorry, but I just can't bring myself to hire someone that cannot take the time to write a proper resume. Some will argue that I could be passing on the greatest employee I ever had, but to me it just shows a sign of laziness when you can't take the time to use proper grammar while writing your resume.
Besides having to ask my 12 year old how to interpret an entire page of random letters strung together, I also enjoy the new punctuation. For the most part, I have observed that punctuation does not exist in text language. Call Judge Judy, because I am also guilty of not using punctuation when I text. However, when I do write outside of the world of text messages I do use punctuation. Although, I do believe that I overuse, the, comma, at times, in, my sentences, IDK.
One of my favorite new punctuation marks is: !!! I really do not know if there is a name for this mark. I know that "..." is an ellipsis. It was one of my favorite things to use when I was in college. At this time my sister should probably just skip to the end of this post, and not read the following section. Just pretend that I have an ellipsis placed in this part. I was writing a paper in college. It may have been one of my last papers. Anyway, the professor required us to use a certain number of references for our paper. OMG!!! I ALWAYS!!! hated that. I felt that if I could write my paper with fewer references, and still make lucid points, then it should not matter. I was finished with the paper, but needed one more reference. I found a sentence in a particular book that I had not quoted yet, but the middle part of the sentence I wanted to use really did not support my point. In fact, it may have supported the opposite. (Seriously, skip to the end ... ... ... . that should get my sister to move forward.) Well, here comes the ellipsis, buddy, pal, friend to those in desperate need. (the other thing you should know is that I wrote all of my papers the night before. so the library was not open at midnight the night before my paper was due.) (to the younger generation, a library was a big old building with a ton of books in it. Think of it as yesteryear's internet. To access it you had to drive to the building and enter the doors, then use a search engine called a card catalog. it was manual.) I digress. Soooo, maybe an ellipsis was inserted in place of the section of the sentence that disagreed with my point, and the remainder of the sentence fit perfectly into my paper. Whew! another A on my paper.
I told you that story to take up some space. (back in the day it was called BS to extend your paper.) Now we are presented with "!!!" what does it mean? I know that "!" is used to imply strong emotion, so maybe "!!!" means HEY I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY, mean it. Why three exclamation points? Why not two, or four? Is five right out? Is there some rule similar to the rules for the Holy Hand Grenade of Anitoch whereby we shall not pass three? Will my sentence self-destruct should I <gasp> put !!!!! at the end of my sentence? IDK The pressure and strain of new rules for punctuation is overwhelming.
Maybe "!!!" is a more severe ellipsis. Maybe it means "hey I edited the heck out of this quote, and it probably does not even retain its original meaning." Perhaps, had I been writing that final college paper in today's world I would have used "!!!" to get my last reference in my paper. That probably would have led to me getting a B on the paper which would have really ticked me off and led to me sending a WTF? email to my professor, and then double secret probation.
THIS IS THE SECTION TO WHICH MY SISTER SHOULD SKIP, OR MAYBE JUST READ TOMORROW'S POST AND FORGET THIS ONE EXISTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL
ABT2 B2W
TTYL!
Thursday, October 18, 2012
Talk about Pop Musik
Generally speaking I like all kinds of music. Certainly I enjoy some genres more than others, but usually I can find something that I like in any style of music. For as long as I can remember I have enjoyed listening to music. Music soothes my soul, and speaks to my many moods. Many who know me know that I grew up listening to 80s metal/hard rock. I still enjoy listening to these same groups, but you would be in error to label me a metal-head. I tend to try and avoid labels of any kind as I believe it is a mistake to try and force people into a box. but that may be another discussion.
As I sit here in the office with very little to do (i have completed the daily crossword, and have increased my knowledge of the world by reading Yahoo news) I have become aware of the fact that we listen to a local station that plays pop music.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ly5fwalNxmk&noredirect=1
you are welcome for getting that little gem stuck in your head.
I will admit that I do like quite a number of the numbers played on this station. (like how i demonstrated why our language is so hard to learn?) However, I have discovered hell. Just how many times in one day can a person listen to "moves like jagger" before they lose all sense of self? or want to go and make sure jagger can no longer move at all so Maroon 5 will stop singing about it. (fyi-probably my least favorite song on the planet). I can guarantee you that Sisyphus may have had to push that boulder up a hill all day long just to have it fall back to the bottom of the hill, but that is not what got to him. Not even close. Sisyphus would have gladly pushed multiple boulders up that hill if only Zeus would stop playing Gotye's "someone that i used to know" over and over and over and over...well you get the point.
As awful as it is to hear the same songs all day long, and quite frankly i could probably set my watch by the times that said songs are played each day, I have learned at least one valuable lesson. NEVER, EVER, NEVER, date Taylor Swift. I don't care if she is the last woman on Earth, and you are the last man on Earth. Not even if she is the apple of your eye. Especially not if you have completely lost your mind because you made the mistake of going to work with Sisyphus and you also had to hear Gotye 5000 times in a row. Dating her will start off great. You will have the time of your life as you navigate your way through the wonderful world of fame and fortune, but just know that you are going to wake up one day, turn on your radio, which for some reason is no longer set to Hair Nation on sirius/xm, and find that a song has been written about you. You will learn how awful of a person you are, and how you have ruined Taylor Swift's life. Quite a burden to carry for dinner and a movie. (you probably made the mistake of taking her to see the Red Dawn remake.) The worst part is that the entire world is going to hear that song about a million times in the first week alone; Taylor Swift will win some lame award for the song, and you, sir, fine upstanding citizen of our planet, you will be lucky to ever date again.
Fortunately, we are blessed with "intelligence for your life" form John Tesh. On second thought, I have no clue what that means. Well, I have to go and re-implant my brain. Off to the car where i can cleanse my brain with some Led Zeppelin. Now there is some intelligence for your life. Classic.
As I sit here in the office with very little to do (i have completed the daily crossword, and have increased my knowledge of the world by reading Yahoo news) I have become aware of the fact that we listen to a local station that plays pop music.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ly5fwalNxmk&noredirect=1
you are welcome for getting that little gem stuck in your head.
I will admit that I do like quite a number of the numbers played on this station. (like how i demonstrated why our language is so hard to learn?) However, I have discovered hell. Just how many times in one day can a person listen to "moves like jagger" before they lose all sense of self? or want to go and make sure jagger can no longer move at all so Maroon 5 will stop singing about it. (fyi-probably my least favorite song on the planet). I can guarantee you that Sisyphus may have had to push that boulder up a hill all day long just to have it fall back to the bottom of the hill, but that is not what got to him. Not even close. Sisyphus would have gladly pushed multiple boulders up that hill if only Zeus would stop playing Gotye's "someone that i used to know" over and over and over and over...well you get the point.
As awful as it is to hear the same songs all day long, and quite frankly i could probably set my watch by the times that said songs are played each day, I have learned at least one valuable lesson. NEVER, EVER, NEVER, date Taylor Swift. I don't care if she is the last woman on Earth, and you are the last man on Earth. Not even if she is the apple of your eye. Especially not if you have completely lost your mind because you made the mistake of going to work with Sisyphus and you also had to hear Gotye 5000 times in a row. Dating her will start off great. You will have the time of your life as you navigate your way through the wonderful world of fame and fortune, but just know that you are going to wake up one day, turn on your radio, which for some reason is no longer set to Hair Nation on sirius/xm, and find that a song has been written about you. You will learn how awful of a person you are, and how you have ruined Taylor Swift's life. Quite a burden to carry for dinner and a movie. (you probably made the mistake of taking her to see the Red Dawn remake.) The worst part is that the entire world is going to hear that song about a million times in the first week alone; Taylor Swift will win some lame award for the song, and you, sir, fine upstanding citizen of our planet, you will be lucky to ever date again.
Fortunately, we are blessed with "intelligence for your life" form John Tesh. On second thought, I have no clue what that means. Well, I have to go and re-implant my brain. Off to the car where i can cleanse my brain with some Led Zeppelin. Now there is some intelligence for your life. Classic.
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
Round and Round
Let me begin by saying that I appreciate the support I have been given in my blogging endeavors. That being said,I would be most appreciative if any of you bloggers can tell me how to get my blog to automatically show up on my Facebook page when I post a new blog.
One might think that after a stellar Presidential debate last night that it would be all I can talk about today. While that is tempting, I try to stay fairly apolitical in public venues. It has been my experience that what begins as cordial, political discourse usually will quickly transform into otherwise rational folks becoming somewhat belligerent. Frankly, it is simply too early in the morning for that.
Therefore, today I intend to return to discussing movies. (I swear I will not talk about movies all the time.) However, after my ranting about lack of new ideas in Hollywood I began to think about the last good movies that I did watch in the theater. The most recent movies that I went to see are: "Looper," "Trouble With the Curve," and "Argo." I have to admit that overall I was pleased with all 3 movies.
Looper: here's the feel good movie of the year! I confess that I find movies that include time travel interesting. I like to see how the writer handles the conflict and trouble that time travel can create. My initial thought about the movie was: "huh, now here's a job I'm sure I could do." Now don't call the authorities just yet; I have no intention of shooting people sent back in time by the mob. The application process is a bit too onerous for me. My second thought while watching the movie was: Joseph Gordon-Levitt looked like he should be in a rock-a-billy band rather than shooting people in a corn field, but then I've never really met anyone that shoots people in a corn field so what do i know. I was surprised that I enjoyed this movie as much as I did as it had great potential to be a clunker. The ending was a bit of a surprise, and frankly I would have had a different ending. Maybe that is why I fix teeth and don't write screenplays.
Trouble With the Curve: Amy Adams is in it need I say more? Predictable ending, but I'm a sucker for these kind of movies for some reason. Anything that deals with the relationship between a father and daughter gets me a little choked up. Don't be fooled by the gruff exterior, I'm a softie at heart. Not sure I would spend the dinero to see this movie at the theater (oh wait, i already have.), but it's worth watching at some point in your life. Apparently, I did feel the need to say more, but seriously...Amy Adams I would watch her sit and drink coffee.
Argo: SPOILER ALERT- I am not convinced that the 6 hostages really listened to Led Zeppelin in the Canadian Ambassadors home, but then I was not there. I was surprised at how tense I was during the movie. I know how the story ends, heck I watched it on tv when I was much younger, but for some reason I found myself tense and unsure if they would make it or not. Which I suppose means that it was a good movie.
Maybe there is some hope for Hollywood. MAYBE
One might think that after a stellar Presidential debate last night that it would be all I can talk about today. While that is tempting, I try to stay fairly apolitical in public venues. It has been my experience that what begins as cordial, political discourse usually will quickly transform into otherwise rational folks becoming somewhat belligerent. Frankly, it is simply too early in the morning for that.
Therefore, today I intend to return to discussing movies. (I swear I will not talk about movies all the time.) However, after my ranting about lack of new ideas in Hollywood I began to think about the last good movies that I did watch in the theater. The most recent movies that I went to see are: "Looper," "Trouble With the Curve," and "Argo." I have to admit that overall I was pleased with all 3 movies.
Looper: here's the feel good movie of the year! I confess that I find movies that include time travel interesting. I like to see how the writer handles the conflict and trouble that time travel can create. My initial thought about the movie was: "huh, now here's a job I'm sure I could do." Now don't call the authorities just yet; I have no intention of shooting people sent back in time by the mob. The application process is a bit too onerous for me. My second thought while watching the movie was: Joseph Gordon-Levitt looked like he should be in a rock-a-billy band rather than shooting people in a corn field, but then I've never really met anyone that shoots people in a corn field so what do i know. I was surprised that I enjoyed this movie as much as I did as it had great potential to be a clunker. The ending was a bit of a surprise, and frankly I would have had a different ending. Maybe that is why I fix teeth and don't write screenplays.
Trouble With the Curve: Amy Adams is in it need I say more? Predictable ending, but I'm a sucker for these kind of movies for some reason. Anything that deals with the relationship between a father and daughter gets me a little choked up. Don't be fooled by the gruff exterior, I'm a softie at heart. Not sure I would spend the dinero to see this movie at the theater (oh wait, i already have.), but it's worth watching at some point in your life. Apparently, I did feel the need to say more, but seriously...Amy Adams I would watch her sit and drink coffee.
Argo: SPOILER ALERT- I am not convinced that the 6 hostages really listened to Led Zeppelin in the Canadian Ambassadors home, but then I was not there. I was surprised at how tense I was during the movie. I know how the story ends, heck I watched it on tv when I was much younger, but for some reason I found myself tense and unsure if they would make it or not. Which I suppose means that it was a good movie.
Maybe there is some hope for Hollywood. MAYBE
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
Burn Hollywood Burn
I have always loved going to a movie theater to see movies. There is something about sitting in a large, dark room with a ginormous screen in front of you that makes a movie more exciting than watching it on your tv while lounging on the couch. Although, I have learned that movie theaters frown upon sitting around in your underwear to watch their movies, so watching a movie at home does have some limited advantages over the theater experience.
Over the years I have learned to enjoy going to the movies on my own. However, it is possible that I have merely come to embrace the fact that I am single, and therefore I simply tell myself that going to the movies by myself is in fact extremely enjoyable. When possible, I try to go to a mid-week matinee so that I can save a few dollars, and probably be the only one in the theater at that time. (which makes me wonder why they care if I sit around in my underwear since no one is around.)
Lately, I have become a bit disillusioned with Hollywood. This disillusionment began a few years ago when all of the movies I took my daughter to see had to be in 3-D. Honestly, I do not see where 3-D adds to the movie experience in any way. Whoopity-Doo it looks like parts of the movie are coming out of the screen. I just don't see how that is worth an extra 5 bucks for my ticket. (you ladies may have enjoyed Magic Mike more if it were in 3-D, but then again maybe not). I really did not have a problem with the movies being made in 3-D, but felt like the reasoning behind it was to get more money out of me the consumer, and less about improving the movie-going experience. A return of smell-o-vision might be more agreeable.
The second step towards disenchantment with Hollywood stems from their need to remake movies. As I sat through what felt like hours of previews during my last visit to the theater my attention was nabbed by a preview for the movie "Red Dawn." About the only good thing the original "Red Dawn" has going for it is that it is a humorous look back at our paranoia in regards to the Soviet Union, and that it had a couple of hot women in it. Not really enough to warrant a remake. Add in remakes of "Footloose," "Clash of the Titans," "Conan the Barbarian," "True Grit," "Total Recall," (the list goes on) it makes one wonder if Hollywood has either given up on new ideas, or they think we are just dumb enough to pay to go see movies that we have already seen. A quick google search will show you that at least 50 more remakes are in the works for the upcoming years. I don't want to see "Dirty Dancing" again, and if I did I would want to watch the original version at home, on my couch, on a Sunday afternoon when I have nothing better to do; not at the theater where I have to now spend 10 bucks to see it, because apparently the 5 bucks I spent to see it 25 years ago was not enough.
The final straw for me (which proves Hollywood believes that if they show it we will come) is that now Hollywood has begun to re-release kids movies...in 3-D!!!! Not even a remake, just a change in format, same story. I liked "Monsters Inc." very much, in fact I own the DVD, but I have no desire to spend 15 bucks to now see it in 3-D.
All I am asking for is something new. The only people coming out with new story-lines at the theater are those making horror movies, and that really is not my cup of tea. Surely, there has to be some young screen-writers out there that would love to have one of their stories on the big screen, and are probably even willing to have it released in 3-D or smell-o-vision (or...gasp...both). It is disappointing to have to choose between a remake of "Arthur" and "The Thing" for my movie theater fix.
Now if you will pardon me, "Real Genius" is on tv for the 30th time this week, and I must watch it...again.
Over the years I have learned to enjoy going to the movies on my own. However, it is possible that I have merely come to embrace the fact that I am single, and therefore I simply tell myself that going to the movies by myself is in fact extremely enjoyable. When possible, I try to go to a mid-week matinee so that I can save a few dollars, and probably be the only one in the theater at that time. (which makes me wonder why they care if I sit around in my underwear since no one is around.)
Lately, I have become a bit disillusioned with Hollywood. This disillusionment began a few years ago when all of the movies I took my daughter to see had to be in 3-D. Honestly, I do not see where 3-D adds to the movie experience in any way. Whoopity-Doo it looks like parts of the movie are coming out of the screen. I just don't see how that is worth an extra 5 bucks for my ticket. (you ladies may have enjoyed Magic Mike more if it were in 3-D, but then again maybe not). I really did not have a problem with the movies being made in 3-D, but felt like the reasoning behind it was to get more money out of me the consumer, and less about improving the movie-going experience. A return of smell-o-vision might be more agreeable.
The second step towards disenchantment with Hollywood stems from their need to remake movies. As I sat through what felt like hours of previews during my last visit to the theater my attention was nabbed by a preview for the movie "Red Dawn." About the only good thing the original "Red Dawn" has going for it is that it is a humorous look back at our paranoia in regards to the Soviet Union, and that it had a couple of hot women in it. Not really enough to warrant a remake. Add in remakes of "Footloose," "Clash of the Titans," "Conan the Barbarian," "True Grit," "Total Recall," (the list goes on) it makes one wonder if Hollywood has either given up on new ideas, or they think we are just dumb enough to pay to go see movies that we have already seen. A quick google search will show you that at least 50 more remakes are in the works for the upcoming years. I don't want to see "Dirty Dancing" again, and if I did I would want to watch the original version at home, on my couch, on a Sunday afternoon when I have nothing better to do; not at the theater where I have to now spend 10 bucks to see it, because apparently the 5 bucks I spent to see it 25 years ago was not enough.
The final straw for me (which proves Hollywood believes that if they show it we will come) is that now Hollywood has begun to re-release kids movies...in 3-D!!!! Not even a remake, just a change in format, same story. I liked "Monsters Inc." very much, in fact I own the DVD, but I have no desire to spend 15 bucks to now see it in 3-D.
All I am asking for is something new. The only people coming out with new story-lines at the theater are those making horror movies, and that really is not my cup of tea. Surely, there has to be some young screen-writers out there that would love to have one of their stories on the big screen, and are probably even willing to have it released in 3-D or smell-o-vision (or...gasp...both). It is disappointing to have to choose between a remake of "Arthur" and "The Thing" for my movie theater fix.
Now if you will pardon me, "Real Genius" is on tv for the 30th time this week, and I must watch it...again.
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