Let me start by getting straight to the song for this post. I believe that I have listened to this song on New Year's Eve every year since about 1984ish., and so I once again shall listen to it in 2012.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8kx8wGRNZX4
Here we all are on the edge of another year being in the past, and a new year just ahead of us. It's an interesting time when most of us will make "resolutions" of positive changes for our lives, and most of those resolutions will be long forgotten within a few weeks. I gave up the practice of make New Year's Resolutions years ago. I began to feel like I was simply setting myself up for failure each year. Making promises to myself that I probably had no real intention of keeping.
I do find New Year's Eve a good time for some reflection. A time to take a few moments to look at where I've been; a chance to consider where things went wrong, and what things went right.
New Year's Eve is also a time when people like to celebrate, and why not? We all now have one more year under our belts. And what says "good job on surviving another year" better than going out mingling with a crowd of people you don't know, and getting hammered? That seems to be the prevalent celebratory function. Making New Year's Day filled with the wonder and excitement that is known as a hangover. Yet others will celebrate by sitting at home and watching one of the many New Year's Eve programs that will include some of the year's big musical artists, and then counting down the seconds to the New Year as midnight approaches.
For me, I usually just sit at home and watch movies and pass out on the couch around 10 PM. I don't like to be on the roads as most people are probably intoxicated so why tempt fate. I have experienced New Year's Eve in Times Square, and while I am glad to say I was a part of almost a million people crammed into Times Square I would have to say you are better off watching it on TV. For one, the "ball" that they drop looks like a tiny speck since it is on top of a very tall building. Secondly, they shut down Times Square. Once you are on the Square, you are not getting back off the Square until after midnight, and since it is packed and closed down at around 430 in the afternoon it is quite a long time to stand there (usually in the cold). On another occasion I had the chance to celebrate New Year's Eve on Bourbon Street in New Orleans. Once again, it was packed with people and you had to fight your way into the different bars to get a drink. I was especially impressed with the people who thought it would be a good idea to bring their children to Bourbon Street. My favorite quote from this experience came from a boy who appeared to be 8ish "mommy, what is that man doing laying on the street?" Fortunately, he was not referring to me. I was also surprised on New Year's Day as I was up by 8 or 9 am and decided to walk down Bourbon Street to take in the after-math. The surprising part was not having to step over someone that was passed out on the side walk in front of the hotel, but when I passed several bars that were offering 3 for 1 drinks...at 9AM mind you. I probably should not have been surprised to see that in a city with drive thru daquiri shops.
Along with the parties comes some other strange rituals. Supposedly if you eat black eyed peas and greens to bring prosperity. That may be the reason I flounder in a sea of average financial standings. I have never eaten either of these items on New Year's Eve. Another interesting superstition says that whomever you kiss at the stroke of midnight New Year's Eve/Day is the person you'll spend the rest of your life with, or that your relationship with that person will be strengthened. It is this superstition that has led to many Restraining Orders against me taken out by some seriously high profile, A list celebrities. Due to legal reasons I am unable to list any of those celebrities, but believe me our relationships are as good as they can be after said kisses. Well and from 300 yards away from each other.
No matter how you choose to celebrate this glorious event I wish each of my loyal readers a safe and Happy New Year.
now that it is about 2 hours before the New Year arrives (at least in my time zone) I will probably go to sleep and completely miss the dawning of a new year. which is my normal MO. (modus operandus, not Missouri which would make no sense if I meant Missouri.)
Monday, December 31, 2012
Friday, December 14, 2012
it's the end of the world
WOW! Has it really been two weeks since I last graced all of my loyal followers with my witty presence? My apologies to all 3 of you for putting up with such neglect. I suppose as long as that check keeps coming in the mail you all will continue to demonstrate such undying loyalty. I am so undeserving.
Yes, I do realize that I'm a week early for the end of the world, but I consider myself to be a planner. I like to be the first to arrive; I want to get the good seats to what I can only assume to be a General Admission event as I have been unable to locate end of the world tickets at either Ticketmaster, or StubHub. Seems to me that if one of those two sites are not selling, then they are not to be found.
The good news regarding the end of the world is that we will find out who wins this season of X-Factor prior to the world coming to what can only be a glorious end, I'll at least get to see the first installment of "The Hobbit," and my sister will be able to celebrate one more year of aging prior to the sudden demise of the world as we know it. The bad news is that the winner of X-Factor probably won't even get that 5 million dollar check before the end, and thus will have put up with all of the stress of the competition for naught.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z0GFRcFm-aY
I must admit that I have a few questions about how this whole end of the world will take place:
Where does it begin? Will it be like New Year's Eve where you can watch the end of the world happen in each time zone? (I'm certain that ABC has already bought the rights to show that live.) Or will it be an all out global demise where it all ends at once? What does one wear for the end of the world?
These are questions that I need answers to before the event takes place. I may need to go shopping for an outfit that is appropriate, and stock up on snacks if it is to be televised. If it is to happen all at once, then I need to take the week off so that I can go and do all those things that I have not had time to do by now. It will be a challenge to squeeze it all in to one week, but I figure some good coke (the powdered variety that smells good) will keep me going for my "End of the World Blow Out. You're all invited. BYOBlow
As for snacks, I have stocked up on Twinkies and Ding Dongs. (the originals, not some crazy knock off). I'll be selling those for about 20 bucks a Twinkie or Ding Dong. Although what the money will be used for is hard to say as the world will be ending. I also plan to have some sausage balls, and pigs in a blanket near in order to balance the sweet with some savory. And bacon, must have bacon on the last day of existence. I"m thinking I'll just wrap bacon around the Twinkies.
I find myself in long bouts of deep contemplation as to how the world will end. Personally, I'd like for some Mayan uprising of a long hidden society that after centuries of obscurity have decided that it is time to say "up yours you Eurocentric visigoths." (only said in their language, and not in English, or spanish.) That would be a sight to see, especially as I am in the middle of a shamanistic mind-altering spiritual awakening. And it satisfies my need for the underdog to ultimately come out on top. And, it's more entertaining than just a simple explosion of the planet. How passe.
Now if this "end of the world" turns out to be some sort of hoax, or just does not come true, I am going to be in a bit of a pickle come the week after said event. I'm sure the recovery time from all that 'snow' and mescaline is longer than I may imagine. Maybe I should just go ahead and plan to watch the event from the Betty Ford Center, or get Dr. Drew on speed dial just in case. But surely those Mayans aren't wrong. I do have reservations about our interpretation of the Mayan calendar so maybe I should just go to work as usual. What a way to go out...at work.
How do you intend to enjoy the final week of the world?
Yes, I do realize that I'm a week early for the end of the world, but I consider myself to be a planner. I like to be the first to arrive; I want to get the good seats to what I can only assume to be a General Admission event as I have been unable to locate end of the world tickets at either Ticketmaster, or StubHub. Seems to me that if one of those two sites are not selling, then they are not to be found.
The good news regarding the end of the world is that we will find out who wins this season of X-Factor prior to the world coming to what can only be a glorious end, I'll at least get to see the first installment of "The Hobbit," and my sister will be able to celebrate one more year of aging prior to the sudden demise of the world as we know it. The bad news is that the winner of X-Factor probably won't even get that 5 million dollar check before the end, and thus will have put up with all of the stress of the competition for naught.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z0GFRcFm-aY
I must admit that I have a few questions about how this whole end of the world will take place:
Where does it begin? Will it be like New Year's Eve where you can watch the end of the world happen in each time zone? (I'm certain that ABC has already bought the rights to show that live.) Or will it be an all out global demise where it all ends at once? What does one wear for the end of the world?
These are questions that I need answers to before the event takes place. I may need to go shopping for an outfit that is appropriate, and stock up on snacks if it is to be televised. If it is to happen all at once, then I need to take the week off so that I can go and do all those things that I have not had time to do by now. It will be a challenge to squeeze it all in to one week, but I figure some good coke (the powdered variety that smells good) will keep me going for my "End of the World Blow Out. You're all invited. BYOBlow
As for snacks, I have stocked up on Twinkies and Ding Dongs. (the originals, not some crazy knock off). I'll be selling those for about 20 bucks a Twinkie or Ding Dong. Although what the money will be used for is hard to say as the world will be ending. I also plan to have some sausage balls, and pigs in a blanket near in order to balance the sweet with some savory. And bacon, must have bacon on the last day of existence. I"m thinking I'll just wrap bacon around the Twinkies.
I find myself in long bouts of deep contemplation as to how the world will end. Personally, I'd like for some Mayan uprising of a long hidden society that after centuries of obscurity have decided that it is time to say "up yours you Eurocentric visigoths." (only said in their language, and not in English, or spanish.) That would be a sight to see, especially as I am in the middle of a shamanistic mind-altering spiritual awakening. And it satisfies my need for the underdog to ultimately come out on top. And, it's more entertaining than just a simple explosion of the planet. How passe.
Now if this "end of the world" turns out to be some sort of hoax, or just does not come true, I am going to be in a bit of a pickle come the week after said event. I'm sure the recovery time from all that 'snow' and mescaline is longer than I may imagine. Maybe I should just go ahead and plan to watch the event from the Betty Ford Center, or get Dr. Drew on speed dial just in case. But surely those Mayans aren't wrong. I do have reservations about our interpretation of the Mayan calendar so maybe I should just go to work as usual. What a way to go out...at work.
How do you intend to enjoy the final week of the world?
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